Jump Ahead

“If Trump is President, I’d say the Simpsons predicted the future.”

Here It Comes

He picked out a new stick from the store between practices and a sleepover with the grizz gang.

Early Spring

Earlier, between the emptied pizza box and popcorn flung over his chair, I cleaned up. I stripped the bed linens, piled them on the floor, and opened up all the windows to clear the air. “Don’t you want to go sledding?” “Nooo.” So spring began.

Joy

I love watching him play. It is such a privilege and a honor to watch him. I'm sad each time I miss a game because I'm at work. His love of the game has changed everything to a whole other kind of joy and contentment.

Off He Goes

I was putting the house together, he tore it apart. Room by room. Then he poured baby powder all over the bathroom floor and put his little footprints in it. The room soaked up the talk, baby, and goodness like a damp sponge. At least he smelled good. This morning, after he packed, I drove him to the airport Washington DC and left breakfast as an afterthought.

Keep The Party Going

I found them playing roller hockey in the street. Already. 

How Beautiful A Day Can Be When Kindness Touches It

I sat in the cafeteria at a long table, pinned close to a conversation about addiction. One is addicted to TV and sugar, the other presumably nothing or at least she doesn’t say, asking questions instead. Their conversation raised itself above the hum like a little fluffy cloud, above the music, the clang of soup spoons on bowls and mugs scuffed on wood. They inadvertently dominated the room. I glanced at photos from yesterday’s game about a state championship and the coach who created a solid goal for the team. He used 4,000 man-hours from volunteers to carve out the word “FAMILY”. The idea of love and unity fit the scene altogether.

State Final

We came in second place, swirled pucks and played a game that sucks your breath away. Before bed, Max snapped some chats with the trophy and played a song on the radio. He turned up and down the volume, loud then soft, pausing to talk to Markus and lip sync, and head bop. A natural performer. I’m in love, what’s that song . . .

Solar Power

Sunday: cinnamon rolls, game watching, orange juice (some accidentally poured into milk), blown down trees, walk, pepperoni and cheese pizza, gator and lemon ades, posters in rolls (here’s lookin’ at you Kid), movie day on the couch (Recent games), afternoon light and shadow angling in, hands in paint (again).

Little Hints of Spring

After the game, we went to the restaurant where my favorite (and only) burger in town is located. It’s the old school kind with grainy black and white images. I climbed out of the car, not so excited to clean the vomit off Morgen's shoe that he'd stepped in. A sign was taped to the bathroom door outside: Out of order. The blue gray paper towels were wetted and inside the room was dark as a starless night. I read the sign again. Someone wrote in purple ink, Please open again soon. Another in red marker, We need you! I left and whispered, Don’t leave throw up on the road . . .

Winning Face-Offs

Morning sunshine. Ice hockey and pucks. Clothes pile put away. Smoothie. Avocado hummus sandwich. Emails open and sent. A walk downhill and back to the game.

+++++

Game Four

Thursday: five more inches of snow, oatmeal, Kind bar, babies (so many babies + precipitous + cord prolapse + Caesarean sections —the little ones all survived although anesthesiologist headed straight for the door) needed to pick up Gatorade and my boys (holy fast moving day), out into the tundra, drove to Costco (triathlon inspired water bottles!), Max given Motrin (why is everyone feeling so sh*tty? and why does he get it every time?), whirled snow caught midair, fan filled seats (mostly parents but lots of students/friends too), M*U*R*R*A*Y!, “You don't have to collect money,” he said, “Okay, Viewmont will,” (not on Monday) first goal, Max assist and back door, Spartan flag with a runner, penalties, hat tricks, win to M*U*R*R*A*Y.

Speedy Recovery

We sat together on the bed. Cookies and Train take-out for lunch. In America afterward. Remains of morning (cut Percocet, berries, and yogurt) left on the tray. Take-out boxes on the counter. Raspberry shake and gone.

Rehabilitation

I dressed in sweats and listened to Hawaiian music (IZ) on the speaker. She hopped to the shower and got up and down from her bed with the walker, I Think To Myself What A Wonderful World, and I helped her.

13 Candles

My baby is thirteen today...

He also just scored the go-ahead-goal in his game today in California! 

Best Friends Forever

Love Olympics Day. Of course I attended. Back from hospital, home in time for the shower. Hold me now (Thompson Twins), Perfect (One Direction), Blueberry Hill (Fats Domino), You'll Be In My Heart (Phil Collins). A whole night of music and games and food and friends. I love that.

A Sweet Surprise Just For You

Morning pain pills. Wheelchair and a walker. Clothes for working out. Pepsi. Wouldn't eat her omelet or hash browns. Hopping up and down on the step. A walk down the hall into her room.

XOXO Your-not-so-secret-admirer

I went after a marathon once to Disneyland. We walked all day and returned to the hotel for dinner, blisters, and Motrin. Marko mixed hockey in with fun, went to the new space mountain, Max sent me a snap from Radiator Springs, Dole Whips, and wished I could be there, then went to work to deliver babies again. I think a road trip west is in order.

How sweet it is to be loved by you

I dressed in scrubs and listened to It's Good To Be Alive (Hallelujah) on the radio. They jumped up and down on the couch with the book, Of Immaturity, and I let them.

Practice Playing Cupid

Back into the fog routine. They sent out the email for school balloon Valentine-a-grams so I called the school and ordered 13 for his birthday to be delivered today and delivered the glazed donuts for my mom's nurses yesterday. This sweatshirt he opened for his present early, marched up and down our road, cheeks flushed and head tilted balloon-ward. He caught snow on his tongue while I delivered babies at work. I wore myself out and slept after I came home from the hospital with my mom at 2:45 am. We set around the room with bowls of CafeRio and chips until Mom woke, and hoped for another day of the same.

Easy Ways To Say I Love You

“Hi, I’m here to see my mom?” She stood in the medroom dressed in hospital scrubs and black square glasses. My car was parked in the driveway. “Sorry, your mom is injured.” My mom recited her birthdate from memory. “That’s right, but the surgeon isn't here.” She sighed then gave me a hug and we both started crying again once over. We weren’t expecting my mom to fall and I hadn’t prepared myself. Her little body laid next to me, her hip and cut off stained pants flapped off the side of the bed when I lifted the covers to look. Quite the shattered femur. I glanced over her shoulder and noticed the IV pump was beeping. “Well, that’s the fifth IV they've placed.” “What’s your pain level, with a broken femur being a ten.” The conversation continued for several minutes until her dilaudid came around and pain left.

Signs Of Affection

6:45 game start. Second playoff: Viewmont and Murray. Locker room, banner, collect money, cheer. Voicemail messages from Dad. Fell. Shattered Femur. Surgery, no question.

Make Someone Else's Day

Saturday at Basketball & Hockey. Another weekend game was on its way. We waited in the hall while they changed and passed time listening to my mom tell me about her work and my dad asking me about mine (since he wants to know how many babies I have delivered so far although I lost track). Everyone within reach of the rink planned to arrive by 4 pm. After three loops around the parking lot we found a spot near the back along with three piles of snow left at the entrance. I ate Love Potion #31when we loaded up on the ice cream with the gift cards from my mom. Saturday was a good one.

Birthday breakfast in bed...

Love, Post By Post

Saturday: night shift headache, late morning oatmeal, hockey, no laundry and lots of cookie making.

This Valentine Is Hot

After breakfast, he put snow on the radar. I stood at the window and watched snow fall from the sky like flour from a sifter. Morg moved from shuttle to bus and worked his way around the mountain perimeter. Each time, he got better and better and yelled woo.

Pass Love Notes

Evening came earlier than expected. I turned the radio off, left soup bowls and dinner plates piled in the sink, then ushered the little brother then the other off to hockey. It was already too late for soup or hot chocolate and more sleep or finishing the last few pages of Erin Hilderbrand's A Summer Affair, I should have chosen to rest above all else. But the newborn twin babies were warm and freshly bathed and reminded me of my sister and her boys that will be one year old next month, before long the static of nightshift had the final say.

Made In A Heartbeat

The day started a few minutes late. School power outage, nap, lunch swap (Wendy's instead of cafeteria). The boys and I danced to House in the car under the soft blue sky. What else could we do? Last night, I drove to Hire's, veggie Big H for me. Another sunny day, how many had it been this winter? Surely, more than last, which seemed moody and slightly mean, as winter can be. We danced again after dinner. Skipped my sister Lara's dinner on Saturday, so picked up her gift on the way, then headed to her house. Back to Hire's, where they climbed into almost our same seats and opened her present before dinner.

Warm Their Hearts

“I never believed that groundhogs were looking for their shadows. I thought they were looking for hockey sticks to get a goal before spring.”

Spread The Love

The room was empty. Open windows. Pink and blue belly bands. A table and bassinet set in the wall, away from the windows and towards the oxygen lined wall that reminded me of licorice ropes and dentists. I imagined standing at the table, unable to move, until one baby after the other took shape. I looked up and he gave me the look, dinnertime.