Last week, one of my friends at girl night – a fellow over-apologizer – pointed me to a small piece of advice:
Don’t say I’m sorry when you really mean to say Thank you.
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I’m sorry I’m late accepts fault for things you may or may not have been able to control, not entirely at least. Your child’s last-minute skinned knee. A (real) traffic jam. The weather.
Thanks for your patience acknowledges that you’re late, and that being late isn’t ideal, and that as a result of your late-ness, the other person has (hopefully) granted you patience by waiting.
And that requires a Thank you.
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I’m sorry is an apology for your shortcomings.
Thank you is an acknowledgement of others’ virtues.
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I am very frequently saying ‘Sorry’ when I mean to say ‘Thank you’, and my girlfriend is very frequently, very gently, reminding me to knock it off.
