It’s a running joke in our friend circle that I’m impossible to speed up (surprise, surprise) and Martin is impossible to slow down. A single glance at an empty calendar square and the man’s found a way to fill it with four conference calls, three house projects, two oil changes, one heaping pot of curry and a hair cut all before the sun goes down.
Once, I spotted him doing sit-ups while conducting a zoom meeting, and well, that’s a whole new level of multi-tasking for me.
And so, when this summer found us both home and fairly free, the calendar split wide open, the two of us sitting in the dining room, me dishing out pasta salads, I was wholly unsurprised to hear this before his fork hit the first cucumber:
Hey. I'm remodeling the shed in the backyard.
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| Our Latest Project In Photos |
I suppose I’m saying all of this to note that, often, when we see finished projects on this side of the screen or another, it’s tempting to gloss over the irksome details. The times neighbors took over and construction was shelved for weeks, or months multiplying the timeline along the way. The small budgets shattered in favor of sanity and lawsuits. The miscalculations, misreports. The patience required of us both, the bending of our own wills.
In short: it will be ever worth it.
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| A Remodeled Shed In the Backyard |
I’ve come to realize in recent years that what we love about the ones we love is rarely uncomplicated. It doesn’t always make sense, doesn’t always line up on paper. I’ve long admired Martin’s drive (who else as a P.h.d?), and part of that means accepting the times his projects take precedence over our time together – as a couple, as ourselves.
Loving him has meant cheering on his lovely dreams, even when they eclipse my own down-to-earth pragmatism.
Here, then, is how our relationship has worked in this season: He, on a ladder lassoing the moon. Me, holding the bottom rung for steadying.
While the space isn’t yet finished, it’s close, and I’ve been sneaking in to sweep the floor here and there. Each time I do, a couple of bricks or 2x4's in hand, I survey the shed and see many happy bikes ahead in this secret hideaway – more birthdays to celebrate, more tires to change, more chains to clink, more life to live.
And I realize, of course, I’ve got it all backwards. Martin never once meant to lasso the moon. He only wanted to bring a bit of it closer to us.
